You don’t “have to”… A simple language tweak that will make a huge difference

Reading time: 1 minute 30 seconds

What do you reply if a friend asks you about your plans for the weekend?

It’s likely your response will be like “Saturday afternoon I have to go and watch my son’s football match”, or “Saturday morning I have to take my daughter to her dance lesson”, or “Sunday I have to go and visit my parents”.

Can you see the common denominator here? I have to.

“Have to” makes anything looks like an obligation.

But I’m pretty sure those things are not something you wouldn’t do anyway if you could opt out.

In reality, you want to spend that time being your son’s cheerleader, or enjoying your daughter’s passion for dancing, or chatting with your parents.

So, what could you reply instead?

A simple verb swap will do the trick here. What if instead of “I have to” we say “I get to“?

“I get to go and watch my son’s football match”, “I get to take my daughter to her dance lesson”, or “I get to go and visit my parents”.

This way, you express your gratitude for those moments you can spend with your loved ones, all while reminding yourself how lucky you are.

Bonus: If you say “I get to” and the people involved in your plans are present (your kids, for instance), they will feel loved and appreciated.

Now it’s your turn!

Do you use “I have to” when you tell others about your family plans? Can you see yourself making the swap with “get to”?